What if Super Mario . . . wasn't so super?

Vintage gaming this week (figured out SimCity 2000 on Windows 7), but it was child's play compared to this:

SUPER MARIO CROSSOVER

ENJOY

Goldeneye Stand-Off

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

2 Hour Review of Final Fantasy VIII

With the new Final Fantasy game being released this month, I thought it would be sweet to look back on the old FF games with fond memories. But much like the 70 minute review of the Phantom Menace, someone decided to take something I thought was pretty good... and shit all over it. I know this will enrage Dave especially since he LOVED FF8. I obviously don't agree with all the nitpicked points in this review, but it's still amusing to hear the guy bitch about the Draw system, the card mini-game, and whiny mopey emo jerk Squall. Posted below is the 4th part which tears into the beginning of the story. Enjoy!

REVIEW: Uncharted 2 and Assassin's Creed 2

I might as well review both of these games together, because they make for a good compare/contrast on what PS3 games (and franchises) are capable of.

Uncharted was the reason to own a PS3. It looked amazing and it provided a fresh game-playing experience. In fact, only the best kinds of games can make you forget the normal game mechanics. Yeah, we've seen 3rd person shooter games, platforming games (Crash Bandicoot), and puzzle games (Tomb Raider), but never before in such a beautiful, intense, humorous, and flat-out entertaining package.

For Assassin's Creed, even though it was a massive seller, people kind of look back on it with a sour look to their face. It took a sweet premise and sick graphics, and then made it repetitive and a little boring. AC also put a unique twist on familiar gameplay.It took the sandbox mentality of Grand Theft Auto and added a new dimension to it. You weren't just walking the streets during the Crusades-era Middle East. You could now climb walls and traverse rooftops whenever you felt like it. Nothing was off-limits. But of the two, AC had a lot more ground to make up.

For the sequels, the interesting thing about this comparison is how each game adapted to the complaints from their first efforts. People say Uncharted was too linear. You were always moving along one path from A to B. Guess what? They didn't care, because it's still that way for Uncharted 2. Instead, they took what was so great from the first one and elaborated on it even further. The character interaction in Uncharted 2 is unparalleled. Whether it's the well-acted cutscenes or the one-liners during gameplay, you can't help but care about the characters and the plot because of how it's delivered to you. Also, they took the big set pieces from the first game and kicked them into high gear. You get to be inside a building while it's collapsing from helicopter fire. You get to travel along a moving train like Steven Seagal in Under Siege 2. You get to jump from truck to truck while narrowly avoided explosions. This game delivers big time on it's ability to make you feel like you're in a Hollywood movie. Bottom line: if you ever wanted to be Indiana Jones, then buy this game.




Assassin's Creed 2 took a different approach. It listened to the critics and fixed almost all of it's many flaws. Combat, exploration, traversal, and side quests are all more complex and interesting. There's a currency system, new upgrades, and home-base to decorate with armor and paintings. You can invest in your local town to increase tourism and trade. You can do the main story at your leisure, accept missions from local townsfolk, or just explore. The music, costumes, scenery, and voices make you feel like you're in Renaissance Italy. The only knock I can think of is they went from a boring, borderline stupid character in the first AC (Altair) to a pompous, unlikeable brat in Ezio. Fortunately, there's so many little things to keep yourself invested in (changing your clothes to something more fashionable, exploring underground Roman Ruins, getting revenge on the jerks who pickpocket you) that you forget about the jerk main character.

In a year when Modern Warfare stole all of the buzz and the sales (review forthcoming), it's worth mentioning that Uncharted 2 was hailed as the game of the year by almost every major gaming magazine, and Assassin's Creed was almost always a nominee. I didn't even mention that Uncharted 2 offers a online multiplayer component that is just as addicting. But if you're sick of games serving up the same old space marines vs. aliens shoot-em-up plot, or if they're rehashing franchises to the nth degree (that would be you, Mario), then look no further than Uncharted 2 and Assassin's Creed 2. These games highlight what creative originality can get you.

Bottom lines:

Uncharted 2 - Pound for pound, the greatest single-player adventure you'll ever take.
Assassin's Creed 2 - Open world addiction at it's best... takes sandbox mentality and turns it into a work of art.

Obviously... both games get an A+

Video Games: NHL 10 Review

You'll have to see my NHL 09 review to get half the story, because the mechanics and game engine remain the same. And that's not a bad thing because NHL 09 was the best hockey game ever created. This year, EA Sports decided to concentrate on updating and adding a few new features, so that's what I'll look at.

1. Boardplay - This takes some getting used to. To make the game more realistic, you can now pin guys into the board and struggle for control of the puck. This means that the old way of doing (plowing into them with huge body checks against the boards) has largely been done away with. In many cases, if you go full speed into a guy on the boards, it'll just be a glancing check. They want you to pin them and fight for the puck. I thought it would slow down gameplay, but it really doesn't. It makes cycling a more important aspect of the game, which I'm all far. By and large, a welcome upgrade.

2. Fighting - One of the sore spots of NHL 09 was the fighting. This year, they revamped it and developed a first-person fighting system. Guess what... it also stinks. You have to dodge, aim your punches, block, pull their heads down, so it's pretty strategic. But still, fights are over way to fast and I'm just not a fan of the first person view. The only cool thing is that when your guys loses, he gets a black eye for a game or two.

3. Music - Hands down my favorite new feature, the custom music option allows you to use music from the PS3 hard drive. You can play these playlists while navigating the main menus (hello Backspacer), but the real fun is during the game. You can set specific songs for certain in-game events, customize songs for specific teams, or easily set a song or playlist for every arena in the league. For me personally, my Pens come out to Thunderstruck. Bang on the Drum plays when I score goals (as a nod to disgraced Pen, Jaromir Jagr). The Jaws theme comes on when we get a Power Play. I even have annoying arena songs like this and this and this to play during stoppages in play. The only drawback is that songs start from the beginning, so if you want a specific section to play, you need to crop the song before loading it to the playlist.

4. The Crowd - Never before has a hockey accurately captured the emotion from the crowd when the home team scores. Never ever. In fact, I can't think of any sports game that has accomplished that. I enjoyed the NCAA games where the screen shakes from the noise of the home crowd, but usually in hockey and football games, you see low quality crowd (most of them duplicates) woodenly stand up. It sucks.... but not anymore. In NHL 10, when the home team scores, the crowd roars, everyone jumps to their feet, and the clones are less noticeable. It's little things like this that maybe aren't necessary in a hockey game, but when they are done right, the game is sooooooooo much better.

Most everything else that matters (create-a-player, gameplay mechanics, play-by-play, etc.) remains that same. The result is once again the greatest NHL game of all time.

A+++++++

Batman: Arkham Asylum Review

There has never been a good Batman game. Period. He's been the subject of shooting games, racing games, fighting games, but not one of these games have ever captured the true essence of the Dark Knight until now. Arkham Asylum builds not just a complete Batman experience, but an all-around gem of a game.

First, let's talk story. The Joker has lured Batman into a trap at the famous Arkham Asylum. He busts loose and then orchestrates a jail break that Batman must deal with. Along the way there are twists and turns, but it's important to note that the story was written by the guy who was in charge of the awesome Batman: the Animated Series. Mark Hamill is back to perfectly voice the Joker (which is good, because the Joker does a lot of talking), and they also got the voices of Batman and Harley Quinn to return. All of them are pitch perfect and they make the game feel right.

Next, let's talk look. The graphics kick ass, as they should, but the design also nails the atmosphere and mood of Batman. Arkham is spooky and gritty, and Gotham is always looming wonderfully in the background. As the game progresses, Batman starts to feel the wear and tear. You can visibly see cuts in his cape, scratches on his face, dents in his armor, and his facial hair even grows as the night progresses. The music's dark and majestic tone also rules, though it doesn't have the iconic score from the show or movies.

Finally, and most importantly, let's talk about the guts of the game: the mechanics. I would say the gameplay is a cross between Assassin's Creed and Metal Gear Solid. Like Assassin's Creed, you're a superior fighter often forced to face 5, 10, sometimes 15 people in a group. Like AC, it's a lot of fun because your equipped to rip them apart one by one, though it is a challenge. Batman's martial arts are in overdrive as you hear all the punishment he dishes out (hearing bones break is especially sweet). Like Metal Gear Solid, stealth is your best friend. The Dark Knight is no match for guns, so you have to cling to the shadows, walk in grates under the floor, move through vents, and strike from the rafters to dispatch the enemy methodically. Remember in Batman Begins when Bale first becomes Batman and takes out the guys at the dock without being seen? It's just like that. Like I said, the points of attack are different, but so are the methods. You can hang upside down from a gargoyle and snatch a guy from the ground. You can lure enemies away from their post or sneak up behind them. You can knock a guy out, then put exploding gel by his corpse so that when someone else investigates, they get blown up.

What's also cool is the open world feel to the island. It lends itself to plenty of exploration. My only knock against the game is that some of my favorite baddies are missing, but with sales through the roof, you better expect a sequel.

Does this game represent Batman accurately? Yes. He doesn't kill people, he doesn't use guns (just cool gadgets), he utilizes his skills as master fighter, expert hunter, and cunning detective. It captures the psychology of Batman with some trippy levels and hallucinated sequences. And it's pretty dark, as it gives a chilling look at the minds of the criminals.

Like I said, this isn't just an awesome Batman game...

A

FILM: Mario Kart: The Movie (Trailer)

After blowing our minds for 15+ years on the small screen, everyone's favorite Nintendo franchise brings its red shells, battle modes, and Mushroom Cups to Hollywood. Released this past week, MKTM's trailer gives us a sneak peak at what surely will be the most dramatic racing movie since Too Fast Too Furious. For you purists, this one delivers the goods: A) Mario as the lead, B) Wario as the fat, evil villain, and C) all the supporting characters in their comic relief glory. Critics will be surprised by the superb acting, soundtrack, and stunning emotional layers to MKTM (Mario hitting rock bottom, the origins of Baby Mario, etc.). While I do think this trailer reveals a little TOO MUCH plot (SPOILER: A dumb main character dies!), a story of "loyalty and love" has this reviewer licking his chops to get to the theaters. Ah, too bad its a fake. Daisy sucks.

VIDEO GAME REVIEW: Ghostbusters

*By Dave*

I've known about this game for quite a while, back when it was being rumored. I was excited to play it when I heard that the story and screenplay for the game was written by Comedy DemiGods Harold Ramis and Dan Aykroyd. The next sign of good news came when most of the original cast came back with Ray and Egon to voice their respective characters (including Bill Murray, Ernie Hudson, Annie Potts, and the uptight guy who plays Walter Peck). Even Bryan Doyle Murray shows up to help, though voicing the new Mayor of NYC. I then got my hands on the demo, and sure enough, everything about it was enjoyable, so I decided to go out and rent it. All the stars seemed to align for it, and the game delivered in a big way.

The script is funny, with laughs coming from all the characters. The story is original, set in 1991, and takes the Ghostbusters to new lengths to stop the ghosts from having their way. The PS3 graphics were near flawless. Characters were a complete match to their acting counterparts (Ernie Hudson looks so accurate it's scary). The environments were very detailed and always impressive. Even boring library interiors looked amazing, so when you're taken to parallel ghost dimensions, the backgrounds had me stopped and looking around at everything, even mid battle against Class 5 Roaming Animators! But when it comes to curious exploration, it doesn't get better than the former firehouse-turned-Ghostbuster HQ. Lots of fun stuff to check out and interact with. Playing with the proton pack never got boring either, and throughout the game new effects keep getting added to it to ensure the fun never died. Old friends show up throughout the game, like the Librarian from the film's first scene, and Stay Puft Marshallow Man. The easter eggs are great when you can find them, bonus points for the Vigo painting (which is back at Ghostbuster HQ for analyzing) taunting you whenever you go passed it. And keep your eyes peeled for a choice Indy reference.

A few faults are pervasive throughout the game. For one, while the voice acting is great, some of the interplay between the characters seems stilted. Having all four Ghostbusters doing their lines together in the same room, riffing off eachother, would've been a great improvement (no matter how impossible to schedule). Secondly, while the angle of playing as the new recruit works well, it would've been far better to have the recruit say something every now and then. He says absolutely nothing. This isn't GTA 3. You can't get away with that crap anymore. There's a little too much reliance on the existing films also. You battle Stay Puft. Again. You fight in the hotel from the first movie and wreck up their ballroom right before a party with the annoying Hotel guy yelling at you about the bill the whole time. Again. You go down to the Library stacks and chase the Gray Lady, again. Lastly, it would've been incredibly ideal to have Sigourney Weaver back for a few lines, and it would've turned a good game into a legendary game had Rick Moranis reprised his role as Louis, the sweaty, nervous Accountant/Tax Attorney. As I've said before on this website, he's notoriously hard to get when it comes to acting gigs these days. The man is enjoying semi-retirement and so the game will suffer a tad for it (only a tad though). These faults are minor , and only worth mentioning because it's a review.

The pros far outweigh the cons. The game is certainly challenging, not at all a walkthrough. The fights are lots of fun, and there's a lot of satisfaction with each ghost you capture in the trap. It's the closest to being a Ghostbuster you and me will ever see, so soak it in and enjoy.

FINAL VERDICT: B

WEB: The Real Game Genie

I remember Game Genie being sooooooooooo awesome...

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

VIDEO GAMES: Demo Reviews

With the Mrs. out of town and my NHL 09 season winding down, I needed a diversion to get me through the week. I considered downloading FFVII from the Playstation Store for 10 bucks, but I wasn't looking for something that would suck up 40 hours of playing time. So, I downloaded the demos for Ghostbusters, UFC Undisputed, and Battlefield 1943.

GHOSTBUSTERS

I've heard good things from reviewers, and you can't go wrong with a story (set a couple of years after Ghostbusters 2) written by Harold Ramis and Dan Ackroyd, especially when all the original voices are on board. The demo level has you back in the same library from the beginning of Ghostbusters where the guys see their first ghost (the librarian). The graphics are awesome, and the chit-chat amongst the Ghostbusters is amusing, but the mechanics are a bit wonky, and it was dumb being the unknown rookie. A demo is supposed to jump out at you and catch your eye with the best level available (think Uncharted), and I just didn't get that sense from Ghostbusters. SKIP IT

UFC 2009: UNDISPUTED

This game reminds me of two things. Firstly, when Tony Hawk came out in 1999, it took the gaming world by storm and made skateboarding a popular sport that you could find on ESPN. I get a similar feeling playing UFC's video game, which is selling like hot cakes, and MMA's popularity has never been bigger (again, just look at ESPN's coverage). The second thing I think of is Madden. What Madden was to me in college (every dorm was playing it), Undisputed could be for the next round of kids. There's just something so enjoyable about beating the hell out of one another. The graphics are so realistic, the attacks look, sound, and feel punishing, and more than anything, it's a thinking man's boxing game. Every attack has a counterattack. Is he blocking the head shots? Work the ribs. Is he an aggressive striker? Slow him up by keeping him in tight with the clinch. Stuck playing defense on the ground? Time his punch with a grab and go for the submission. Fights could last 45 seconds and they could last 10 minutes depending on the fighters. I feel like I may be overhyping the game, but it really is a blast. BUY IT!

BATTLEFIELD 1943

What's amazing about this is that, for only $15.00, you get a multiplayer experience that other games might charge the full $60.00 for. The game consists of 4 or 5 maps, all from the original PC game, Battlefield 1942. The object of the game, and the tools to carry out the objectives are pretty much the same, but the graphics and gameplay is amped up for the PS3 version. The game's maps hold dozens of people with no lag and, unlike the original 1942, they keep track of your achievements as you get promoted up through the ranks. While I would much rather play UFC Undisputed if I had the choice, there are very few games that you could get at this price for this much quality. Besides, there a few things in life better than scoring a headshot on a real person with a sniper rifle. BUY IT

TRIBUTE TO A LEGEND

Lost in all of last week's boo-hooing over Jacko / Billy Mays / Oscar Meyer was the passing of a real legend. It's been a week now, and nobody here at Top Ten has mentioned it, so allow me to take a quick minute to pay tribute. Last Saturday, while he was innocently napping on the coach, Steve LaTreal McNair (1973-2009) was shot four times (2x head / 2x chest) by his whacko Iranian girlfriend, and died in Nashville, TN.

Let's make one thing clear - McNair was very annoying in real life. But in the Madden Universe - where dreams come true - there was no better field general, no better QB, no better 1st round pick, no better anchor to any team. In several "franchise" seasons between 2002-2006, "Air" McNair was not only an ironman for my Miami Dolphins, but he was also a recurring visitor in opponents' nightmares. Throughout the roller coaster of countless wins and (few) heartbreaking defeats, McNair never once missed practice, demanded a trade, killed any dogs, or dropped my team's moral levels.

So let this be a lesson to all you single guys and engaged webmasters. If you're gonna cheat on your crabby wife, try not to do it with a teenage psychopath. We'll miss you, Steve. Let the Madden Gods always honor your #9 in the Madden Hall of Fame. From this day forward, I will never play with the Dolphins again.

Enjoy these memories (but for God's sake mute the sound):

VIDEO GAMES: Uncharted and Assassin's Creed Sequels!!!

Back in the day when our family subscribed to Gamepro (the Sega Genesis to PSone era), there was always excitement for the fabled E3. I still don't know what the 3 E's stand for (Entertainment and Expo are two of them), but this event has grown even more legendary, almost like the Comic Con of video gaming. This year, a lot of crazy stuff was announced and displayed, like Microsofts ambitious new motion sensitive controller (except, you don't use a controller!?!?), trailers for FFXIII, and many more Mario games for Nintendo. But the stuff that blew me away the most was NOT the God of War 3 demo (I never played 1 or 2, so I don't care yet), but the demos for Uncharted 2: Among Theives and Assassin's Creed 2.

Instead of just giving us more of the same, the creators of these games went above and beyond to improve graphics, story, gameplay, missions, details, weapons, etc, etc, etc. I haven't been this excited since the Diablo III gameplay footage was unveiled. Watch and love both of these videos.

VIDEO GAMES: NHL 09 Review

With the glorious return of playoff hockey, I felt the urge to play some PS3 puck. Unfortunately, NHL 06 looks shitty on a flat screen TV, and that was enough of an excuse to go out and buy NHL 09. I'm not sure when they overhauled the control system, but after getting used to it, I love it. The right joystick is now used for shooting (flicking down to wind up and forward to fire) and for checking. The right joystick is also used to control the stick on breakaways. It adds an extra layer of difficulty when you're trying to be Charlie Conway on a breakaway (it's especially annoying that if the game ever goes to a shootout, the computer AI does the same gay move where they drag it behind them until the last second and then tuck it under the goalie's 5-hole. I have no idea how to do this). That's probably my only gripe (also, the fighting system kind of stinks). The graphics and flow of the game is amazing. The checking engine is the best I've ever seen. When players are skating forward and the defensemen hip checks them, they can flip over and slide down the ice a bit. Every hit feels real and animation is fluid. Yep, the new edge Unis are in the game, and the player faces look better than ever. The defensive AI is really smart and doesn't let you walk into the slot for a goal. You really need to work the puck around and find open men, because they will tie you up, block passes, and poke check anything around them. Still, there's always been 2 things that have bugged me about hockey games of the past (we've owned NHL 94, 95, 96, 97, 98,2000, 2001, 2002, 2004, and 2006)

• Deflections: Past games have never tried or have failed to get deflections right, but they are so important in real hockey. Thankfully, in NHL 09, shots from the point are often tipped on their way to the net. And they can go anywhere. Shots can be deflected down, up, left, right, on net, way off net, anywhere. If a shot is heading wide (they often do), skilled guys like Malkin can steer it back towards the net with a tip. It's great.
• The Power Play: In the old days, a power play never meant a change in tactics. In real life, the PP means strategy. Shots from the point through a screen, passes around an umbrella to get the goalie out of position, etc. But in video games, you did the same thing you always did, which was usually setting up one-timers in transition. In 09, because the AI is so adept at clogging passes and shots in the slot, you need to stop and set up an attack. And when you're killing a penalty, they set up a proper PP against you as well.

In conclusion, this is, by a country mile (as 09 announcers Gary Thorne and Bill Clement will say when you miss the net), the most realistic hockey game ever created (even to the point where goalies might let up soft goals for no reason other than it just happens). I haven't even tried extra features like playing online or creating a custom team yet. Just based on the in-game engine, I'm sold, and you will be to.

A

VIDEO GAMES: Madden Cover for 2010

*Posted April 13, 2009*

To coincide with the NFL Draft, Madden football will announce this years cover boy. They already sent out a list of potential candidates, including Ben Roethlisberger, Adrien Peterson, Larry Fitzgerald, Troy Polamalu, and Ed Reed. There are some rumors swirling about that they may try something revolutionary this year and have more than one person on it, like Polamalu covering Fitz. In 2006, Big Ben was also a finalist that year, but the honor went to Shaun Alexander. That year, Alexander was bit by the Madden curse and had broken bones in his foot and ended with a terrible season. He has since been released by the Seahawks. In spite of the curse, I still think should be Big Ben's year. He has suffered car crashes, knee injuries, and concussions every season anyway so I don't think the curse could throw anything more at him. But last year they went with QB Brett Favre, so what are the chances of them going with another QB?

VIDEO GAMES: Review - Skate 2

*Posted March 15, 2009*

10 years ago (I'm so old), my friend Jake brought over the Tony Hawk demo that he got from some sort of promotional deal at Pizza Hut, and we played it for an entire weekend. Eventually we bought the game and the next couple after that because they revolutionized an entire genre of gaming and of pop culture. Skateboarding exploded on ESPN around that time because of the success of that game, and without Tony Hawk, we wouldn't have Skate 2. Also, without Tony Hawk, Skate 2 wouldn't be fun. In THPS, the movements and abilities of the thrashers were exaggerated and easy to use. Without much effort, you could be doing 900 Varial + Benihanas and grinds that piece together 10 or 15 different tricks. That's what made it fun. In Skate 2, much like Skate 1, everything is more complicated and realistic. Ollies and flip tricks are done by moving the joystick instead of pressing a button, you actually have to pump on verts to get air (it's tough) instead of just holding X, and you can forget about easily doing benihanas and other advanced tricks like that right out of the gate. That being said, once you get used to the mechanics, its soooooooooo gratifying. This game goes beyond THPS because it's 10x more rewarding because is 10x harder and 10x more realistic, but that's not a knock on the birdman. Skate 2 wouldn't have been successfull in 1999 because of it's complexity and lack of grandeur. In this you play a customized skaterat that rides around in a huge city complete with thousands of things to do tricks on. There's plenty of pools, ramps, benches, curbs, pipes, parks, stairs to have fun with, and the career mode is long and rewarding. You can buy tons of different outfits and decks, and the bail system is amazing. You get points for wrecking, and they even have little missions like "break 10 bones." On the nastier ones, a little X-ray guy pops up with all the damage you did (and a toe tag if your head is busted), and the bone crunching sounds are way cool. If you took the world and feeling of GTA with the style and soundtrack of Tony Hawk, that's what you get with the wonderful Skate 2.

A

VIDEO GAMES: Super Stacker 2

*Posted March 4, 2009*

With the week off and the Mrs. out of town, I've been drowning in a sea of filth and boredom these past couple days. To serve as an appropriate time waster until tonight's LOST, I've been playing Super Stacker 2, a web game from addictinggames.com. It's one of those clever and well-done puzzle games that looks easy enough, but you eventually waste 3 hours beating all 40 levels (that's right, I beat the entire game). It's embedded below, so have fun wasting time.

Play Super Stacker 2

VIDEO GAMES: LOTR: Conquest Review

*Posted February 7, 2009*

From the makers of the very cool Star Wars: Battlefront series comes LOTR: Conquest, a game where you get to fight the biggest battles of the LOTR series. You control one soldier (either a warrior, archer, stealth assassin, or mage) and join an army of fellow good/bad guys to gain control points and win the battle. That by itself is nothing new, and pretty uninspired, but you throw in LOTR locations, Howard Shore's score, and some multiplayer action, and you're in for a treat. You can fight in the mines of Moria, the Halls of Rivendell, the top of the White City, the bowels of Orthanc, and even peaceful hills of the Shire. While you are running like mad to kill the opponents, you can also stop and appreciate landmarks like Balin's Tomb, Bag End, where the Council sat at Rivendell, and even where Gollum falls to his death in Mt. Doom. When those things lose their novelty (they don't really), you can have fun playing as Aragorn, Gaygolas, Gandalf, the Witch King, Sauron, Ents, Trolls, and other big heroes (most of which just have the abilities of regular units on steroids). In the final Evil level, when you get to unleash Sauron on the loser hobbits in the Shire, and you are mowing through them on your way to kill Gandalf, it's loads of fun. And like I said, the music keeps you pumped up. Every time the battle starts with the music from Amon Hen (the video below), it's just my natural reflex to scream out "Elendiiiiiiiiiil!!!" like Aragorn, and you would too. Of course all of this is just minor fun, but when you throw in the online multiplayer, your competiveness takes over and you can enjoy the game even longer. Overall, it's a fantastic game if you're an LOTR fan, but you probably shouldn't bother if you're not.

B

VIDEO GAMES: LOST Via Domus Review

*Posted January 18, 2009*

If this was not a LOST video game, it would be nothing special. The graphics are amazing. The puzzles are challenging and interesting. The environment is constantly changing. But the main character is a major douchebag, and it all falls apart from there. You play as a passenger of 815, a journalist named Elliot who has amnesia. So you both are trying to solve his past, and how he made it on the plane. Well, even though his crazy backstory is a pretty cool one, he's still a tool. I would have rather played as a rotating cast (discover the caves as Jack, explore the hatch with Locke, etc.). Still, you get to walk around all the coolest LOST locations. The beach starts as the plane wreckage and as the game progresses, it evolves into a more developed camp. You get to walk through all the Swan, Pearl, Hydra, and Flame stations (all awesome). You head out to the Black Rock. You even get to run from the Smoke Monster (that gets a little annoying over time). There's a crazy twist ending written by loser Damon Lindelof, and the whole arc of the game is pretty satisfying, yet I don't know why it still stinks. The voice acting is terrible, but the look and movement of the characters are great. The game can be beaten on a lazy Saturday afternoon, and there's not much replay value. I suggest you rent the video game just so you can walk around the beach and chat with the various LOSTies.

C+

VIDEO GAMES: Fallout 3 Review

*Posted October 30, 2008*

This review might a be a little premature since I've only played about 10 hours, but it's enough to warrant some comments. Firstly, Fallout 3 is the first Fallout in the series to be made by the folks at Bethesda Software (They made Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion). And for those who think that Fallout 3 is just Oblivion set in a different place with a different story (and with guns instead of swords), they are absolutely right. The setting is a post-apocalyptic Washington D.C. in 2270. The U.S. went to war with China and everyone got nuked as a result of it. Now, your character is coming up to the surface for the first time in his life to experience what is left of society. And boy, is society depressing. The radiation has created some big monsters and mutated animals. The old towns are rubble, and the new ones are made up of shacks. There's a lot of gray, and a lot of dark gray, and maybe some brown. It's a far cry from the breathtakingly beautiful visuals of Oblivions. Your character iss searching for his dad, voiced by Liam Neeson, but you can pretty much do whatever. Like Oblivion, the mechanics are the same. Same mapping system, same inventory system, same abilties system, same questing system, etc. etc. Because it's an open world, you can do whatever you want whenever you want. Want to tackle the main storyline right away and find your dad? Go for it. Want to instead go exploring and tackle hundreds of smaller quests first? You got it. Feel like robbing or killing people? Be my guest, but the law still exists. Not only is the order you tackle quests yours to decide, so are the outcomes. The only way you lose is if you die. Anything else is fair game. If your quest is to protect some schmuck and he dies, it's not game over. You simply soldier on and deal with the failure. Obviously you'd probably want to reload your game and beat the quest and get the reward, but you don't have to. One thing that Fallout improves upon is the dialogue. The hundreds of people you encounter have no problem saying "shit" and "fuck," which makes it hilarious. But with everyone you encounter, you can choose to either respond to them in a chivalrous manner ("Yes, I'll gladly help out. You have nothing to worry about"), a shady manner ("Whoa there. Nothing is free. I'll do it if you pay me") or in an asshole manner ("Are you fuckin' kidding me? You're on your own"). And that's really the draw of the game. Be the hero or the villain, and you get to check out some awesome graphics, combat, story, and dialogue along the way. Take the Oblivion mechanics and tailor it to any good story and I'll be happy.

A-

VIDEO GAMES: Rock Band 2 Review

*Posted October 30, 2008*

First a dose of history. The boys at Harmonix created Guitar Hero and Guitar Hero 2. Then they split from the big-wigs and partnered up with MTV. The bigwigs still owned the rights to the Guitar Hero franchise, so they hired Activision to come in and make the sequel. The result was Guitar Hero 3, and although a solid game, nothing new was brought to the table. Harmonix decided to make Rock Band, the next big leap forward (added instruments, customization(!), downloadable content). The losers at Activision realized they sucked and basically admitted defeat by copying Rock Band for their next project, Guitar Hero: World Tour. Again, nothing new brought to the table. You still play songs with a singer, drummer, and guitarist. I'm pointing this out because I want you to know how much Guitar Hero sucks now. Not one original thought amongst them. So, it was a no-brainer when I decided to buy Rock Band 2. The good news is that since I own Rock Band 1, I can reuse the old instruments and just pay $60 for the game instead of $180 for the whole package. The bad news is that Rock Band 2 also doesn't break new ground. The interface is improved, and the catalog of songs is very impressive (I know nothing about music, yet I know a lot of the songs from the 70 or so in the game). You can still jam online with people around the world or just party locally with a bunch of people in the living room. The problem with Guitar Hero is that they made it a competition. Their game modes involve lame things like flipping the frets to confuse you. It shouldn't be about solving puzzles. It should be about fake playing music, and Rock Band gets it. The best new feature is the No Fail option. It encourages people who have never played the game before to get up and give it a shot and not worry about screwing things up for anyone else. It's all about the jam. Awesome game. Go buy it now.

A